Brooke Mueller gets Xtreme

Brooke Mueller gets Xtreme

Brooke Mueller is the ex wife of Charlie Sheen. They divorced just shortly befo9re he went nuts and started seeing goddesses. To be clear "goddesses" was what he called his porn actress companions - not that he was seeing hallucinations or anything. For while there some people had there doubts. Anyhow Brooke was the most recent ex Mrs. Sheen at that time.

She and Charlie had a tumultuous relationship. Though his relationship with Denise Richards was inspirational, according to Richards her self in an upcoming memoir, the Mueller deal involved arrests, tabloid headlines, and a Christmas Day Knife Fight. It was the knife fight that caught people's attention and made us realize that Charlie and Brooke had some relationshit relationship issues beyond the standard marriage counseling thing.

Now everyone knew that Charles had some issues. That's because Denise Richards told everyone about it ad nausea back when she was divorcing him, and trying to get every nickel that she could out of him in the settlement. That was back before their relationship was inspirational. In fact in those days she needed everyone to know just how bad he was so they would sympathize with her, and support her, and so she could get the largest settlement possible. Not everyone sympathized. A judge laughed her out of his office after she called some kind of emergency hearing regarding her kids. Then Denise went on to bust up Heather Locklear's marriage and drive the poor woman into an alcoholic relapse. What are friends for? Well the main thing is that somewhere through that whole mess the thing got inspirational - which is kind of inspirational in it's self!

What Denise didn't tell us, because she couldn't - she was busy wrecking other lives; is that Brooke had some heavy issues too. For one thing she liked drugs. Hard stuff like crack and meth, in addition to the prescribed marijuana that she takes for her anxiety (Brooke seems more like the type to give anxiety than to get it). In fact there were some nasty rumours making the rounds that she had to go to rehab for coke even while preggers with her twins by Charlie! She also had to make another return to rehab back during Charlie's freak out. That's when she tried to take thee twins away based on the idea that a crack head is less unfit than a couple of porn actresses. Brooke had some kind of relapse or something during that period and so her parents stepped in. Oh yeah and she was recently spotted with a make shift crack pipe - but Brooke swears she was just holding it for Tatum O Neal. Actually she claims it's for her legally prescribed and anxiety related marijuana.

So it's safe to say that Brooke has some chemical dependency problems, allegedly. With that in mind, and probably to prove that she's a minimally fit parent and keep her seat on the Charlie Sheen Gravy Train, Brooke has entered rehab once again. This ain't some Dr. Drew deal either, but a real serious type get clean facility. For one thing it's down in Mexico. That's where you go when you want results in things like such as stem cell therapy or black market.

This one, located in sunny Cancun, offers something a little special. The clinic specializes in Ibogaine. That's made from the African iboga plant, used in shamanic initiation rituals. The drug si so effective that it's go ten people off of heroin with out withdrawal. There's a pretty low relapse rate too. Not only does it clear up heroin addiction, but other addictions as well, and even "addictive behaviors". This is reputably because the drug has the power to resolve inner neurotic conflicts and free people from neurotic behavior patterns. So naturally it's banned in America. Having sane sensible people wandering around in their right mind is so bad for business.



Anyway if the drug works we could see a brand new Brooke on our hands. Not that she could morph into some kind of Buddha or anything - but it would be nice to hope.As a sane enlightened woman she'll have about as much business in Hollywood as Joaquin Pheonix. However it might make her a little more goddess-like. She might even become a worthy partner for a warlock. So here's wishing her luck on her little rehab shamanic drug initiation ritual! Should things turn out as usual for Brooke, we can look forward to even more colorful mugshots.

BTW The Murdoch scandal is heating up. You'll recall that The News of the World got shut down after deleting some e mails from a murdered girl's cellphone. Some sleazy tabloid types hacked into the then missing girl's phone looking for a story. Since her mail box was filled up the deleted some stuff hoping that fresh stuff would come in. That was basically destroying evidence. As the authorities began rooting around the Newscorp empire they discovered that hacking was a pretty routine way of getting scoops. Even the likes of Jude Law, Hugh Grant, and possibly even Prince William had got hacked.

@BBCWorld BBC Global News

Rebekah Brooks: Sienna Miller #hacking was 'first time senior management saw documentary evidence' of hacking relating to a current employee

3 minutes ago via web Favorite Retweet Reply

So the News got shut down and 200 people laid off. Eventually even the head of the News, Rebekah - what's her name - Brooks, had to resign. She was the Marie Antoinette of the piece so everyone was glad enough for her to go and eat cake. Speaking of just desserts the big man himself had to answer some questions today, and that brought out then screwball comedy in one avenging clown of justice armed with a cream pie - here's the video on that!





Lunapic Photo Editing

Saturday, July 16, 2011

Brangelina Getting Married?

Posted byAgent OrangeatSaturday, July 16, 2011

Remember how Brad Pitt said that he and Angelina Jolie wouldn't get married until everyone of every sexual orientation were free to love int he bridled constraints of matrimony - or words to that effect. Well it sounds like he should of held out for world peace because recently rumbling from Casa de Mirabel - that's the gaudy place they bought over in France to irritate Johnny Depp - have the pair planning on pairing officially!

The wedding is set to take place at Mirabel in 3 or 4 months, according to US Magazine. I'm not sure how they can know this since they're not The News of The World or anything. It's just so hard to get really reliable information these days without good Internet hacking and the odd wiretap. You just have to go by what the stars tell you and they might say anything.

Anyway the mutters coming out of Mirabel have a wedding on the horizon. It's planned as a "intimate and informal" affair. It's also planned to cost about a million bucks or more. If you want intimate and informal you've got to pay top dollar for it, that's just the way it is. If you write a blog it's easier to get 'intimate and informal' with the use of quotation marks. Then again we humble internet bloggers aren't supernova caliber celebrimaniacs, and don't have that kind of style.

So what got into the Toothsome Twosome to get them to do the big about face on the while marriage deal? Will & Kate did just recently tie the knot. That was the wedding of the century, and bravely pulled off without benefit of a prenuptial. I hope that Wills at least had the good sense to use protection before the marriage! Anyhow the Royal Nuptials are a kind of standard you can use to gauge you're own relative importance, based on how much attention your own wedding getting in comparison. Of course you can't expect to get a Will & Kate level of global interest, not even if you're a jumped up movie star with capped teeth and cheek implants. You can still hope though. Since the world has been waiting umpteen years now to see whether or not Brad and Angie would marry, split up, or just kill each other - the suspense is bound to give this the little extra push on the public interest scale.

The some extra incentive too, and those are Brangie's little dividends. "The kids ask about marriage," Pitt told USA Today in May of Maddox, 9, Pax, 7, Zahara, 6, Shiloh, 5, and twins Vivienne and Knox, 3. "It's meaning more and more to them." Now God knows people don't organize their lives around their kids. Not these days any way - unless you're Octomom or something and you've got big money plans hanging on them. However Brangie's kids aren't ordinary kids. For one thing they've been helping support the power couple for almost ten years now. Basically every time Angie adopted or had a date with the turkey baster (her bio kids were artificially inseminated) she booked the cover of People Mag for about 15 to 20 million. That's what she got paid for exclusive rights for the pix. It's also what she used to get paid per film back in the days when she could sell a film. So having a lucrative sideline as an eccentric celebrity breeder came in handy. It also gives the kids a stake in this whole flaky relationship.

So I'm sure that Brad and Angie, being the edgy and unconventional types they are, took their kids wishes very seriously. Well except for "the blob". There's also good news for you - the celebrity following public - in this. Since Angie is bound to pimp out the intimate and informal affair to People (and now's the time as the public is going through royal wedding withdrawal - this Brangie wingding can ride that slipstream the way Desperate Housewives did with Sex & the City!) for the usual exclusive rights top dollar deal you'll get to be there in spirit if not on the RSVP, and for only the cost of a single issue! I wonder how much more they could get with Jennifer Anstion on the guest list?